Monday, August 18, 2008

Our Vice President

Dick Cheney can be a real dick at times....what a convenient name! From spearheading the whole invasion of Iraq to his top secret energy meetings (absent of any real energy policy) and constant fearmongering, Dick Cheney has proven it's okay to be an asshole and still get re-elected to public office. "Go fuck yourself" is such a classy way to conduct yourself while presiding over the Senate. But then again, since when were Republicans very classy?

He's done a lot of shitty things over the past eight years. He "accidentally" shot a friend of his and yet opposes any sensible gun control since, well, you know, all gun owners that aren't criminals are responsible people who know how to shoot and aim straight. Everyone with any kind of instinct and or a functioning brain knows it was him, not Scooter Libby, who threw Valerie Plame under the bus and ruined her CIA career to score a political shot at her husband, Ambassador Wilson, who was critical of the war's justification from the start.

Yet the most disturbing thing, at least in my opinion, about Dick Cheney was his willingness to go along with the Bush/Cheney 2004 campaign's gaybashing to win the election, despite having a lesbian daughter. I'm sure she really appreciated the hypocrsy, but word on the street is that she's a cold-hearted snake, just like her Momma (who I'll blog about at a later date).

I have a feeling the Queen is thinking to herself "I hope he isn't packing any heat" in this photograph, despite her usually stoic disposition. Take it from me, just because you have zero facial expressions doesn't mean you aren't thinking awful thoughts about the fat sow sitting next to you.

Dick's segway mobility allows him to sneak up on unsuspecting victims and scare the shit out of them, likely children or those who have in the past been the victims of gunshot wounds. I'm thinking he deserves a "vacation" to The Hague in January 2009 to get the long-awaited rest and treatment he deserves.

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